Happy or Right

It is often times so hard to practice what you preach.  I talk to and counsel people all the time on conflic management and usually wind up saying the words, "do you wanna be happy, or do you wanna be right"?  Most times, both are really not a possibility, so you have to choose sometime during the dispute, "happy or right"?  I am struggling with this right now, for I know that I am right, fee that things are unfair  and that the other person, if put in my shoes would cause a HUGE sting, cry "foul" and this would escalate in to something much more.... OR.... I would cease to do what is causing the conflict and choose once again, to be happy.

I am also confused about the term, "you make me feel guilty".  Usually, when I feel guilty, it is when I am doing something wrong, or doing something, on some level, that I know in my heart to be "not quite right".  The only way someone can "make you feel guilty", is if you care enough about that person that you care what they think about what you are doing.  If you feel that strongly toward them, that what you are doing makes you feel guilty, then stop doing what you are doing.  If you choose to do it anyway, then own up to it and know that you are being selfish and don't push the fault on the other person for "making you feel guilty".  Your choice, your guilt, I don't want it, you can keep it for yourself, thank you.

I feel like I am getting worn down sometimes and just want to be the total jerk that I use to be, but that solves nothing and I am slowly becoming someone else.... someone a whole lot less interesting than I use to be.... someone getting more and more use to being the whipping dog and have everything be my fault.  I feel guilty for other peoples flaws... I felt guilty as I was sleeping on the couch and Lis was hungry and too lazy to get up and fix herself something, so I did it.... why... 'cause that is the whipping boy I am these days and I felt as if it would be my fault if she did not eat and felt bad later in the day..... pretty warped, yet such is parts of my life.

Happy or right, Happy or right?  I guess I choose happy, for to be right with someone who is never wrong and has the potential to make your life no so fun if they wish, is just not an option.

Who am I?  I use to be Moukie.... now I am just the one who is here to make sure someone gets the ideal spouse (defined by them), and is made to feel small when someone else's need are not being met.  So... is the "Happy" just an act?  I am I really choosing conflict or no conflict, rather than right or happy?  I sure don't feel very happy.